第317页
《简·爱(英文版)》章节:第317页,宠文网网友提供全文无弹窗免费在线阅读。!
mortal, I could not heretofore tell: but revelations were being made
in this conference: the analysis of his nature was proceeding before
my eyes. I saw his fallibilities: I comprehended them. I understood
that, sitting there where I did, on the bank of heath, and with that
handsome form before me, I sat at the feet of a man, erring as I.
The veil fell from his hardness and despotism. Having felt in him
the presence of these qualities, I felt his imperfection and took
courage. I was with an equal- one with whom I might argue- one whom,
if I saw good, I might resist.
He was silent after I had uttered the last sentence, and I
presently risked an upward glance at his countenance. His eye, bent on
me, expressed at once stern surprise and keen inquiry. 'Is she
sarcastic, and sarcastic to me!' it seemed to say. 'What does this
signify?'
'Do not let us forget that this is a solemn matter,' he said ere
long; 'one of which we may neither think nor talk lightly without sin.
I trust, Jane, you are in earnest when you say you will give your
heart to God: it is all I want. Once wrench your heart from man, and
fix it on your Maker, the advancement of that Maker's spiritual
kingdom on earth will be your chief delight and endeavour; you will be
ready to do at once whatever furthers that end. You will see what
impetus would be given to your efforts and mine by our physical and
mental union in marriage: the only union that gives a character of
permanent conformity to the destinies and designs of human beings;
and, passing over all minor caprices- all trivial difficulties and
delicacies of feeling- all scruple about the degree, kind, strength or
tenderness of mere personal inclination- you will hasten to enter into
that union at once.'
'Shall I?' I said briefly; and I looked at his features,
beautiful in their harmony, but strangely formidable in their still
severity; at his brow, commanding but not open; at his eyes, bright
and deep and searching, but never soft; at his tall imposing figure;
and fancied myself in idea his wife. Oh! it would never do! As his
curate, his comrade, all would be right: I would cross oceans with him
in that capacity; toil under Eastern suns, in Asian deserts with him
in that office; admire and emulate his courage and devotion and
vigour; accommodate quietly to his masterhood; smile undisturbed at
his ineradicable ambition; discriminate the Christian from the man:
profoundly esteem the one, and freely forgive the other. I should
suffer often, no doubt, attached to him only in this capacity: my body
would be under rather a stringent yoke, but my heart and mind would be
free. I should still have my unblighted self to turn to: my natural
unenslaved feelings with which to communicate in moments of
loneliness. There would be recesses in my mind which would be only
mine, to which he never came, and sentiments growing there fresh and
sheltered which his austerity could never blight, nor his measured